Sep 15, 2008

we are lost, we can never go home

yesterday i was mentally kicking myself within 15 minutes from arriving to goa. for a while it was ok, but then, well... i fucking don't feel like i have a place there and frankly, i don't think i even want that. i'm sick of all the commune life, it just doesn't do any good to me. it's all fun and love for few days or a week or something, but not more. fuck i need an apartment. soon. fucking hell.
PLUS: today at work was very chill, no hurry at all, but i still felt like shit. my head has been spinning the whole day, my vision keeps blurring, my nose is stuffed and my throat hurts. gaah. i think i'm really sick now. whoops. too bad that i can't afford to take days off =)) fuck yeah. a new guy started today too, this some fruittari/amis kinda dude called tomppa. he's ok. boho i don't want eemeli to quit too soon ;____; he's such a darling x_x
but yeah. now i'm lagging at my girl's place and feeling like shit. and cursing that my goddamn salary hasn't come. and it probably won't before the end of the month =)))) fucking whee. must talk to mister mattila tomorrow about this, because i had a spoken agreement about my salary and it was supposed to be paid every two weeks. my bad that i was so goddamn tired and pöhnänen when i signed the damn workdeal that i didn't realize what it said about the payments. and now i'm just fucking pissed off. i'm basically broke =)) yay.
i think i need to lay down now. maybe watch telly or something and try to rest.

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