baby, did you forget to take your meds

i'm so confused and having all these mixed up feelings right now. all this mess with things is really taking it's toll on me. i haven't slept like really slept in weeks (heck, it might be a month already) and i'm hurting so bad all the time. being tired and sore makes me kinda moody and i've fought already a dozen times not to lose my temper and explode totally. i keep getting these violent flashes when i get angry, and i don't actually like it.
on the brighter side... well i might be getting a new job. just might. i really hope for the best. i'd make some decent money with that.
and tomorrow i need to go to kotka and clean my app. or actually now it's only the sorting and arranging and packing weekend. my stuff will be moved to the stable yard house, so i'm not totally screwed when it comes getting them somewhere before friday next week. i'll be heading back to kotka next too, maybe on thursday evening or friday, because then it's time for a complete cleaning of the app. i hate cleaning. but it's a must.

wine is good, by the way.

fuck i'm so in a mess right now. sigh, i'll just go and start cooking dinner. and drink more wine. peeling potatoes will be more hazard the more i drink. muahahah vittu.

you got your hair combed back, and sunglasses on, baby

again, i'm out of words. reading her writings, damn i was near tears. i hate this, and love this, being a total mess of emotions. 3 weeks will be hell of a long time.
i wanna go to new zealand. or something. i don't know.

"remember boys: flies spread diseases. so keep yours closed!" - george luz <333